The Non-Perfect Pregnancy for Perfectionists

aka: when your body reminds you who’s really in charge

I'm pregnant!

Let’s just say that my pregnancy has been far from perfect. I’ve shared a few happy, glowing photos recently because I am finally feeling better - but I realized that only tells part of the story.

So here’s the truth: The first trimester was rough. I’ve been wanting to write about it, but I wasn’t ready. Now that I’m feeling more like myself, I want to share a bit of what that time actually felt like, especially for anyone who’s been through or is now experiencing it and wondering: Is this normal?

The answer: yes, and some.

Pregnancy for Perfectionists

First Trimester: A Lesson in Letting Go

No one talks enough about how physically incapacitating those early weeks can be. I was nauseous 24/7, beyond exhausted, and barely functioning between client sessions. I’d teach, then crawl into bed until the next one. I wasn’t working out, I wasn’t eating the foods I usually love (don’t even ask about vegetables), and even basic tasks like doing laundry felt like a full-on expedition.

For someone like me, who’s used to feeling strong, active, and in control - this was jarring. I didn’t feel like myself. Not even close.

When Your Body Becomes… Not Just Your Own

There was this bizarre sense that something else had taken over. This “something else” was choosing what I’d eat, when I’d sleep, what I was capable of that day. My body was changing before my eyes, shifting in ways I couldn’t predict or manage. And as a proud recovering perfectionist/control enthusiast... this was not easy.

Let’s not even get into body image yet (I’ll save that for another post). But I’ll just say: seeing your body change so fast when you can’t do much about it messes with your head. A lot.

The Silent Part

To top it off, those first few months are often quiet. You’re waiting on test results. You’re worried. And unless you've told people, you're holding it all in, without your usual support system to lean on. Even with an incredible partner (and mine is), it’s a lot to carry alone.

The Unexpected Gift

But here’s the thing: As hard as it was (and still is, in some ways), there was also something deeply freeing about it. I had no choice but to surrender. I’mI learning to trust this process that is way bigger than me. A process as old as time…literally.

And slowly, something shifted.

Pregnancy - this wild, powerful, mysterious thing, is teaching me to let go. Of control. Of expectations. Of needing to “do it all” all the time.

And weirdly, that felt kind of… peaceful.

The Bigger Lesson

You don’t have to be pregnant to relate to this. I think we all live with this illusion that we’re in control, and when life shakes that up, we resist.

And maybe the real work for all of us perfectionists, is learning how to be okay with being a little messy, a little uncertain, a little more human.

For me, this whole experience has truly been Pregnancy for Perfectionists - a reminder that sometimes the most important growth comes when we surrender control.

And maybe it’s not about being perfect. Maybe it’s just about being present.